I am one lazy ass motherfucker. And I'm a liar too. I started out thinking it would be a great idea to get people to come to my site more often if I updated more since that's what everyone complains about constantly. In fact, this is a plague upon websites run by just one guy so much that Toad at crackhore put up a link called: "site not updated enough?" and it contained a big long thing about not harrassing him. But toad has an advantage that I don't, people repeat visit his site. It's probably true that no one that I have not made go to the site in person has been to my site twice. So anyway, I was gonna update once a week.
And then came the holidays. Now a lesser site runner guy (I didn't want to say lesser man, because no one ever thinks of making websites as being manly) than I might have said: "oh, well I was on vacation for the holidays thats why I missed three updates". Even though I said earlier like a month ago: "I have so much content lined up I could keep going for two months without having to think up new shit. But I wasn't on vacation. You know what I was doing? NOTHING. I was playing video games. Yeah that's right. I took 6 days off of work, everyone I knew was busy every one of those 6 days so I stayed home, didn't update the website and I played video games. Every hour or so I looked over at the computer and said: "maybe I should stop and update my site". But then the Dreamcast said: "well just wait until you finish this level". And it tricked me like that for 6 days. Not just because I'm gullible and sucker for games, but also because I'm lazy. My couch is probably like 5 feet from my computer, and I was lazy enough to think that if I couldn't stand up and just fall into the computer chair then I wanted to wait until I was better rested.
So anyway, that's what happened with the updates thing this past three weeks or so. But that doesn't explain the liar accusation. Well see, I said I had all this content and stuff. But now I think and I think... and it's not there. I lost it all. Either I got drunk and forgot it all, or it stopped being funny to me and I thought that it wouldn't be good to write about.
Now this next point will be one that probably only I remember, but I'll bring it up anyway since it's mentionned in the really-funny Universal Truths of usian.org. I always lie about updating. Like I said, it's a constant. I'll promise to update, even if I say: "I'll update this week I promise". It's a lie. Don't believe it. So, that holding true, one would then find true comedy in my pledge to update once a week.
So, to recap. If you like to read usian.org, you should email me more often and let me know, because maybe I would have gotten off the couch and put up some weird pictures of myself in a wig or something to tide you over until I had a night like this. What you're reading by the way was completely unplanned and I'm not really even sure it's funny. But I can't think of another article and I need to update, even if it's a bad one. So, without further ado, a picture of me in a wig: