My Friend is a Stripper

I have this fairly outgoing friend named Tanya. Tanya is going out with Brian but regardless is very open about her sexuality. She regularly shows us her ass or every now and then will flash her breasts on a dare. Tanya also tends to talk about sex at the drop of a hat. There's even some pictures of her floating around the Internet from when she got a little too drunk and went skinny dipping at the local high school.

It didn't come as much of a surprise to me when Tanya said she wanted to be a stripper after she was fired from her job at Denny's. She looked around at all the local places where they would hire a stripper and decided on one of the two very seedy strip joints around here. So, she went to 'audition' to be a stripper. This audition includes stripping for free in the bar. I personally found it werid that they had auditions to be strippers but I guess it makes sense since I know a lot of pretty girls but not all can dance.

Even more weird was when we were hanging around at Erik's house the other night and Tanya walks in saying: "Guess what! I'm a stripper". This of course opens up a new phase of life. I am now in the phase of life that will be referred to with something like: "I used to know a stripper when I lived in California." or: "Oh yeah, my friend dated a stripper for a long time when I was living in California." Is it some sort of requirement for young life to know, go out with, or be in some way personally connected with a stripper? Are there really that many strippers and strip joints around the world to facilitate this requirement? Do you have to take a pillgramage to the nearest strip joint if you don't have one locally?

So now that Tanya is a stripper I find that there are actually rules to the trade. The rule sheet she brought home was particularly strict about what articles you were allowed to take off and what acts you were allowed to mimic. I assume that the stripper handbook is memorized as it wouldn't be very attractive to see the dancer referencing her manual to see if the thing she was about to do next was prohibitted. Another interesting feature of teh exotic dancing world is the stage name. Tanya got the stage name 'Glitter'. When I asked her how they picked that for her she pointed to her face, which was covered with glitter paint. Highly creative. She said that it was suppossed to be Glitter Goddess but they said that was too long. Erik and I thought that they should have shortenned it to 'Glitterus' instead of just Glitter. It would have been a lot funnier.

I can see myself later on in life talking to buddies about it: "Yeah, I knew a stripper when I lived in California. I can't remember her real name but she used to strip as 'Glitter'. We just always called her Glitterus." And so, one more requirement of being a guy is fulfilled for my life.