Reply Archive II

WHY MUST YOU FOREVER BE AT MY BACK??????

Tis not I who follows you through sleep and wake, the Shadow Warriors are your tail. They never rest, stealing your sanity away when you let down your gaurd. Out of the corners of your eyes you will see them but their intangible arts will lull you away from teh sane and good eventually. Beware friend.

Whens the last time you kicked a brit in the nuts?

When the cops confiscated my BritKickers and my bicycle I had to cut back. Also, when I was arrested at the airport for kicking everyone coming off of the London flight in the nuts, it was another slowdown. Now I only get to kick one or two a week.

My question is, if you are soooo critical and feel you have to point out the negative in EVERYTHING at Disneyland, WHY DO YOU GO???? It makes no sence, have some respect and stop worrying about the lines, there are MANY other things than rides! Have a good day!

Oh my god! I laughed hard when I read this one. Let me just start off by protecting myself while I bash this person. At the bottom of the DisneyLand Rant, I put an Editor's note which says that I really did enjoy myself. Having said that, let me get on to my fun...

Everyone in SoCal will agree with me when I say that the lines at DisneyLand around early July are REALLY Long! I was badly burned by the evil Sun God, Ra. I'm a pasty white boy, I burn easy. As for respect, I truly do respect Disney. No other company in the world could sell me a 30 dollar T shirt. Oh, and just to b petty, you spelled 'sense' wrong. ;)


Would you believe me if I told you that what would make the site better is making the links on the front page more readable?

Well, I seem to think that it won't affect the site's popularity that much but I will do it anyway since it sounds like a good suggestion.

Would you consider publishing the minutes for a meeting of the Usian council? Concerned citizens have a right to know.

Under normal circumstances, it would require a entrance into the council in order to get ahold of this. However, since the citizens would be intrested in knowing the process that their inquieries go through, notes from an Usian Council meeting will soon be published.

Should alligator feet be sold as charms on a necklace?
Animal rights activists are still in an uproar about rabbit's feet, seal snouts, goat heads. I think that alligator feet would be pushing it.

Can what happened to Frank happen to you?
The unfortunate reality is, what happened to Frank can happen to anyone. Men, Women, Children, the Elderly, Blacks, Whites, Straights, or Gays. We all need to be careful because it's out there and it CAN happen to you. People who don't think it can happen to them are just deluding themselves and putting themselves at risk. We all need to wake up a little and realize that Robot attacks are a reality and no one is totally safe.

Are you alive?
Just because I look like a Zombie in the morning doesn't mean I'm actually deceased!

i think im pregnant. The guy is really nice, he hangs out on computers alot and has this really cool webpage, crack somethin or other. But i think he is gay, everytime he is doing me up the ass he screams out about some Us_ guy. Have you ever heard a fullgrown man scream a _ during sex? Should i keep this baby of a weirdo or should i get a coathanger and some salt?
The child is unnatural. You should see the local druids about having it exorcised from your body. As for your boyfriend, Tell him I said: "Toad, you're a sick bastard and I'm going to ban you from my site.".

Why is it cloudy?
Since clouds are not a nationwide phenomenon, you will need to look locally for your answer. Most times when you see clouds in the sky it's the Indians gossiping. If you live in a Frontier town, you should get Pa and run them out of town with Boom Sticks.

How about a movie whose title was 'Sex, Death, Sex with the Dead, and other perversions'?
No, Toad.

Would you watch a movie whose title was 8 1/2?
Absolutely Not. The only condition is if it had Gillian Anderson naked in it.

Is the answer to life, the universe, and everything really forty-two, or is that just a gag?
42 is only the answer if you are British. Because there's more to the world than smoking fags and calling a hyphen a 'stroke' in conversation, I'll give you some quick answers to Life, the Universe, and Everything. To sum it up, It's all about the Benjamins... baby. And No, I don't mean Ben as in Ben's House of Evil. Ben thinks he's a Brit.

What do you get when you cross a guy who looks like Rudyard Kipling and three martinis?
Someone who looks a little more attractive than Rudyard Kipling.

Why are the askus replies so infrequent?
Normally this is because the Ask Us questions are infrequent.

Do you really trust Ben to 'hold you to it'?
I barely trust Ben enough too tell him what state I live in. It's kind of scary being around him, especially when his family doesn't use the Special rubber-tipped silverware. One time he tried to put a knife up our friend Travis' nose. Or so Travis tells me. I always carry a taser when I visit Ben

does a cow have black skin under the black spots ???
This question is often asked by Indian people, because cows are sacred in India. So, in order to show inquiring Indians what's really underneath, we've taken the liberty of shaving a cow here at the Usian Council court hall.
[ Cow Before Shaving ]
[ Cow Post Shaving ]
The cow was quite crazed after being shaved, which you can see by it's eyes. It's easy to understand why nature was kind enough to give it spotted fur. Other farm-yard animals would probably laugh very hard at the shaved cow, turning it into a pariah and potential threat to the lives of chicken and other livestock.